Save me
by AliceMCullen
Summary: Twist to the Jacob and Leah scene next to the cliff at the end of Eclipse. How can a single tear change the course of things? Jacob/Leah *Intended to be one shot but not anymore*
1. Encounter

A/N: Well this is my first attempt in a one-shot fic. I didn't want to add to many details so I kept it T rated. Please comment. As I said the first part is from the book but from Leah's point of view

disclaimer: I do not own anything Twilight/New moon/Eclipse related

"This is making me sick, Jacob. Can you imagine what this feels like to me? I don't even Like Bella Swan. And you've got me grieving over this leech-lover like I'm in love with her, too. Can you see this might be a little confusing? I dreamed about kissing her last night! What the hell am I supposed to do with that?"

"Do I care?" He answered. His face clearly showed what he was stating. He didn't give a damn about me or my feelings.

"I can't stand being in your head anymore!" I snapped feeling my blood boiling inside me "Get over it already! She's going to marry that thing. He's going to try to change her into one of them! Time to move on, boy"

"Shut up" He growled.

I wish I could but, by now, I not longer had control over the words my mouth expelled.

"He'll probably kill her anyway," I kept going despite the fact I could see his anger building up "All the stories say that happens more often than not. Maybe a funeral will be better closure than a wedding. Ha."

I wanted to slap myself, to throw myself out of the cliff as Jake had cleverly suggested earlier in out conversation. I was tired, sick. I was sick of myself and the way I had been acting. I had become this horrid creature. Worst of all, I was sick of having to keep every thought of Jacob away from my mind. Jacob. Little Jacob. He had no idea the desire I felt for him, how my eyes couldn't turn away from where he stood, how they examined and memorized every inch of him. If he only knew how many times I had to force myself to think the most horrid things about him only because I wanted to have his picture in my head. Of course, due to those same images now he considered me a "bitter harpy".

"If you are concerned with gender confusion, Leah…," He started shaking me away from my trail of thought.

I felt lucky to be in my human form, that was the best way to keep my thoughts and feelings for myself.

"How do you think the rest of us like looking at Sam through your eyes?" He scowled. Now he had touched a soft spot "It's bad enough that Emily has to deal with your fixation. She doesn't need us guys panting after him, too."

That was the exact point where I broke down. I could see by the look on his face that he had known what effect this would have on me. How could he be so cold-hearted as to remind me of this? It was only when I felt his arms around me that I noticed I had fallen on my knees. I could feel the moist grass beneath my jeans, tears coming down my face with no control. Maniac sobs reached my ears and it took me a while to realize they were my own. It sounded as if I was trying to laugh but was crying instead. It was the truth; every single emotion I had been hiding until that moment simply came bursting out of me in the form of sobs.

"I'm sorry Leah, I'm sorry" Jacob kept repeating. If he only knew this wasn't because of what he had just said.

I hid my face on his chest, trying to calm myself down but it wasn't working. Deep inside, I was certain this would stop unless I took it all out, and it was going to take some time for me to do that. My hands clanged to Jacob's broad shoulders as if I was unconsciously trying to find a support, something that kept me from running away, the cliff looked so tempting. I felt Jake's hand touch my chin; he brought my face up gently so that my brown eyes were looking at his. Slowly, my sobs started to cease, tears stopped falling down my cheeks and all I could hear was the sound of out breaths. We stood that way, staring into each others eyes and not being able to think about anything at all. He knew; I could feel it even when he wasn't thinking about it, even when I couldn't read his mind.

"It's not you" I managed to whisper "That was meant to happen, the breakdown. Listen Jacob there are a lot of things that I had to keep away from my mind and had been killing me, ripping parts of my heart every time I shove them off. I guess that is what turned me into this…this…monster" I spat looking down at myself.

How I wished to have the courage to rip myself into shreds an end with it all.

"But this is it, Jacob. I can't keep hiding this in me; it's eating me inside making me seem like a bitter harpy as you so elegantly phrased it…"

"I am sorry, Leah. Stop it!" Jacob commanded taking my face with both of his hands and forcing me to look into his eyes one more time.

"You don't need to be sorry because it has been me. It has been me all along. The one who has been hurting every single person in the pack for the sole fact that I couldn't hurt myself!" I could feel my voice rising with every word I said, my emotions overflowing once again. "And I hate me! I hate me for being such a soulless bitch! For being envious of Emily's happiness, god, she was like a sister to me and look at how I repaid her! Then there is Sam, I know every look I give him stabs his heart and still I can't find a way to stop making him suffer even more. And you, I should be the one apologizing to you because…"

My words were cut by Jacob's lips crushing mine with I passion I had never felt before. He backed up for a second to look at my eyes which were now wide in surprise. My heart was beating so fast on my chest I was certain he could hear it now. Without any warning he took my lips again but this time with less impetus. I moved my hands to the back of his neck and tangled my fingers on his shaggy black hair. I brought him closer, I needed him closer. I could feel his own hands traveling to the small of by back while his lips moved in synchrony with mine. Slowly, he laid me on the wet grass kissing down my neck.

"Just don't say anything, not now" He whispered to me bringing his head up again and gently nibbling my ear making me close my eyes in delight.

No more words were said. There was nothing we could put into words. His touch allowed me to know he needed me with the same desperation I needed him. Every kiss sent a jolt of electricity down my spine, we wanted each other. I had no idea if I was doing this because I felt something form him or because I wanted to erase Sam once and for all from my mind. I also didn't know if Jacob had given me the first kiss in order to shut up my hideous rambling. Despite all this, it felt right. His touch felt right, his kisses felt right, like if, somehow, this was meant to be. We were both so alike, in temper, in loss, in passion.

The heat between us was unbearable, we couldn't get enough of each other, being close wasn't enough, we needed more.

Jacob held me in his arms placing kisses on the top of my head. His hand trailed the now bare arm up and down. For a moment a sense of guilt washed over me. What if I used him? What if I was going to hurt him? My doubt was cleared almost immediately when lifted my chin to kiss me gently once again. The flutter in my stomach told me this was real, I was feeling again. If it was love, I didn't know yet, but it was going to be good for both of us. It was going to help us survive.

A/N: So this is it, hoped you like it and, if I get reviews, maybe I will try to make some more chapters for this. Just let me know if you want lemos involved hahaha.


	2. Fear

A/N: Soo I got reviews!!! And I got sooo excited I decided to make another chapter for this story. I hope you can get to know Leah better (or at least my vision of Leah). If you keep reviewing I promise I will write another chapter with the pack included...and maybe I will add Bella (**wicked grin) **This chapter is a bit

"What are you doing to me?" I asked bluntly.

My back rested on Jacob's chest; we were both sited down on the grass. It had been two days since our encounter on the cliff and god knows I've been having the worst of times trying to keep away from him. I had to keep thinking those horrid things about him once again, at least while I was in my werewolf form, all so that the other guys wouldn't find out. I closed my eyes as Jacob's fingers traced down my arm sending shivers all over me. Suddenly, I had completely forgotten all about the pack and the danger of them finding out. He had that effect on me, the effect of making me forget about everything and just live every second as it came.

"Whatever you want me to do" he answered huskily in my ear

I laughed and turned my back around to playfully smack his face.

"You are one hormonal teenager" I joked with a smirk on my face.

He gave me a pained expression and, almost immediately, starting laughing making me laugh along with him. I would have never thought time with him would be so enjoyable. We laughed; it had been so long since I didn't even smiled. I was certain the boys had noticed my change, how my face was not longer contorted in a permanent scowl, how I made much less hurtful comments. Actually, I would stop those comments completely, but then it would be obvious there was something mayor going on with me.

I was shaken away from my thoughts once again by Jacob kissing down my neck.

"Stop it!" I cried laughing and writhing.

"Oh come on, Leah, you love it"

Despite my constant writhing Jacob kept making his way down my neck, he stopped before he reached my shoulder and bit my skin slightly. I intended to let out a chuckle but a soft moan escaped my lips, making Jacob stop on his tracks. I could feel him grinning against my skin, obviously proud of himself. There was something about his boyish quality that simply pulled me to him, and I supposed that the fact I was older added something to my own allure. There wasn't a moment in which Jacob and I could be alone and apart, he always needed to be holding me, kissing me, caressing me and, to be honest, I wasn't complaining at all. I had been lonely for what seemed an eternity and I needed Jacob's touch; there was something about it that made me feel safe.

Then it hit me; I was becoming attached to him, probably as attached as I had ever been to someone, even Sam. This would have been right if we were both completely human, but we weren't. Us werewolves have a disadvantage called imprinting. Jacob hadn't imprinted yet and, neither have I, which meant one of us could get greatly hurt. Maybe I was blowing everything out of proportion but I couldn't help it. With Sam, I had thought I had found the love of my life and suddenly, due to an imprint, he walked away from me, just like that. What if Jacob found an imprint aswell? We loved each other now and there was no doubt of it, but imprint couldn't be ignored. If Jacob ever imprinted he would turn his back on me without hesitation. I wasn't even sure if I could handle being hurt again; having my heart ripped again just when it was starting to rebuild. There was also the possibility I was the one to imprint and, therefore, hurt Jake. Would I be able to inflict the same pain that was inflicted to me? Could I life knowing exactly how he felt? I knew it was unavoidable, but I don't think I would be able to life with that either. It was a loose-loose situation.

"What are you thinking about?" Jacob's voice brought me back to earth again.

"Nothing, just nonsense stuff" I shrugged, trying to give Jacob my best smile.

He raised an eyebrow and shook his head from side to side giving me a disapproving look.

"Don't lie to me Leah, please"

I gave out a sight.

"It's just...we haven't imprinted yet, right? What if one us imprints and leaves the other" I choked on my words as I tried to hide tears.

I hated showing how weak I truly was and how painful the memories of Sam really were. The sole thought of imprinting made me feel as if my heart was being clutched inside my chest with no mercy.

After a while of staring at the grass in silence I finally mustered the strength to turn around to look into Jacob's deep brown eyes. He smiled at me lovingly and gently tucked a strand of long brown hair behind my ear. He gently placed his hand on the back of my head and pulled me into his chest.

"I'll be always here for you" he whispered, soothingly placing a kiss on top of my head.

"How can you be sure of that?" I whined.

I felt completely immature. I knew he couldn't assure me anything and it was obvious he was trying his best to get those thoughts as away form my head as possible.

He gently took my chin and brought my face up so that I was looking at him.

"You know I can't, Leah, but look at the bright side, at least you have someone who doesn't think you are a bitch anymore"

I was prepared to slap him but he began laughing hard, letting me know it was only a joke. I rolled my eyes and shook my head from side to side. I knew then, that I shouldn't keep going with the questions. It was highly probably that Jacob was trying to keep his mind away from problems with the same intensity I did. I placed my arms behind his neck and leaned in so that our foreheads were touching. It was strange how he didn't seem as young to me as he did before, maybe this was because I had realized that, behind that immaturity that bursts every time he is with the rest of the pack, there is a completely mature man.

"So you don't think I am a bitch anymore eh?" I asked, my lips tauntingly close to his.

Just as he was about to kiss me I stood up and stuck my tongue out.

"What about now?" I asked before I turned around and began running into the forest.

"Who is the child here?!" Jacob yelled speeding after me.

Somehow I was beginning to be the old Leah again; the one I was before my heart got ripped into shreds. I used to be so confident, so cheerful and funny; I have no idea how pain could have taken all that away from me. It didn't take long before Jacob reached me. He wrapped his arms around my waist, tackling me to the ground. We both fell laughing and trying to catch out breath. Out of the sudden, rain started to pour. My eyes closed allowing me to feel the tiny icy raindrops falling on my hot skin. When I opened my eyes, I found Jacob's face on top of mine, a smile lightening up his features. I was about to speak when he sealed my lips with his. A kiss as passionate as the one we had shared two days ago. My arms snaked to the back of his neck bringing him even closer to me; I could feel my pulse starting to rush. His lips traced my jaw line in an agonizingly slow motion.

"Jacob" I whispered huskily as he kissed a sensitive spot on my neck.

Slowly, I began to get lost in his touch; I was guided solely by instinct. Jacob's hands found the hem of my shirt and gently rose it up until it rested on top of a nearby fern. Soon, Jacob's shirt encountered the same destiny. My hand roamed Jacob's back feeling his muscles ripple against my fingers, his lips kept moving against mine in perfect synchrony. The heat between us grew with each second; there was too much passion, too much need. I bit my lip as Jake began to kiss down my stomach, his tongue making trails. I had never experienced so many emotions rushing through me at once, I wasn't exactly conscious of what I was doing anymore but, deep inside, I knew I didn't want to go on any further than this.

"Jake, I think we should stop," I said shyly, looking at a side and trying to hide my face.

He probably thought I was scared but well, part of me was.

"It's okay," Jacob answered once his eyes encountered mine "I just thought you..."

Even though he didn't finished that sentence I knew exactly what he wanted to say. He thought Sam and I had gone further than this and it was obvious most of the pack shared that same thought, but truth was I hadn't. Actually, Sam and I had never gone pass the kissing stage and I used to regret it. I had the idea that, if Sam and had been my first then we would have a bond that couldn't have been broken by the stupid imprinting. Now I know it was silly of me to think that, giving myself to him would have only made me hurt more, I don't want to be hurt.

"No, I haven't..." I trailed of uncomfortably

"But that doesn't mean," Jacob started kissing my neck once again "That we can't have fun..."

"You hormonal teenager"

I laughed as my hand combed his hair.

For the first time in my life, I didn't cared it was raining on me.

A/N: So here it is! Yet another chapter! I hope you keep reviewing and remember, if you review you get another chappie! Also give me some feedback of what you think of Leah, Jacob, ideas of how the story should go, etc. Now press the button and review!


	3. Facing

A/N: Okay so this chapter is much more action than thought, but I really like it. This is like a CRUCIAL chapter so you better comment on it.

_Sometimes I walk alone at night when everybody else is sleeping, I think of him and then I'm happy with the company I'm keeping. The city goes to bed, and I can live inside my head. On my own, pretending he's beside me, all alone, I walk with him till morning. Without him, I feel his arms around me, and when I lose my way I close my eyes and he has found me. And I know it's only in my mind, that I'm talking to myself and not to him. And although I know that he is blind, still I say, there's a way for us. I love him, but every day I'm learning, all my life I've only been pretending. Without me his world will go on turning, a world that's full of happiness that I have never known. I love him, but only on my own._

It's been amazingly long since I don't see him, Sam, I mean. I've been trying my best to avoid him at all cost. Well, honestly, not exactly him, I've been trying to avoid Emily. She knows everything about my past with Sam and how it still hurts deep inside to see her happy with him, so I know my presence always makes her uncomfortable despite the fact she smiles and tries to act as if everything is okay; I just know it's not. I remember the time in which we were inseparable, in which we could talk about anything for hours and hours and simply laugh at out silliness, but things were so different now. Stupid, stupid imprinting. I kept looking straight to the ceiling as these thoughts rambled through my head.

Today, of all days, I won't be able to avoid her. It's Claire's birthday and they celebrating it at her house. I know I could have simply declined the invitation but I simply couldn't. I felt something for that little girl, maybe because she constantly reminded me of myself. It's fun to see how she tries to pretend she is a big girl and that she can "hang out" with the big boys of the pack, how she frown every time someone dares to call her "little" and how she tries her best not to cry or pout when she falls. I am certain Quill will have trouble controlling her. That will be something I would pay to see.

Giving out a loud sight, I got out of bed as quickly as I could. I needed to do this before I changed my mind. I ran to the bathroom and tried my best to look decent, but there was no make up that could erase the worried glance away from my eyes. I hated being this obvious sometimes. As fast as I could, I got into the shower only opening the cold water, having a temperature of 108.9 degrees; it's not easy to have a hot shower. For the final touch, I got into a plain beach white dress, I was sure the boys would be completely amazed by this. I was the type of girl who usually wore tight jeans and small shirts, but I guess the reason for that was because, deep inside, I still thought I could seduce Sam. Now, it doesn't matter any more.

The thought of seeing Jake today filled my mind, making a smile crave its way on my face. I am convinced I won't meet someone quite like him as long as I live. What amazes me the most is that he knows that I still crumble when I hear Sam's voice; that I still think of what could have been and, still, he is by my side. Well, I know he stills thinks of Bella and I am still there, with him. Maybe we are part of each other's healing processes.

"Wow have you been stung by some sort of weird bug Leah? Why are you dressed like that?" My little brother's voice filled the kitchen.

I rolled my eyes.

"Well…you like it?"

He suppressed an urge to laugh at his amazed face. Yes, this was the dress I had been looking for.

"I guess…you just look different. Honestly, Leah, is there something going on I should know about?"

"Oh come on! Just cut it! Let's get going, we need to help Emily with the decorations"

I began walking towards the door but, feeling that Seth had remained frozen in his place, I turned around and raised an eyebrow at him.

"Well?" I asked, crossing my arms in front of my chest.

"You actually compromised to help Emily?" he asked, his eyes wide in amazement.

"Yes, you know I love Claire and I want this to go right. Now, can you stop acting like a pain in the butt and just follow?"

I turned around with the speed of a hurricane and bolted out the door, not caring if Seth was following me or not. He probably was. I smirked as I started walking, for the first time in a long while I had felt like the old Leah. I had forgotten how fun it was to fight with my brother. The sound of my own laughter surprised me; I must be looking like crazy, laughing all by myself.

"Leah, do you need to see a shrink or something?" Seth asked quickening his pace.

"Oh shut up twat!" I snapped.

"There is the lovely big sister I love"

His sarcasm was obvious.

It didn't took us long before we arrived to Emily's. My heart was beating insanely fast as I knocked at the door. How would I say hi to her? Should I hug her? Shake her hand? I questioned my sanity at this point. I should have never agreed to come here, I could have taken Claire to eat ice cream some other day and not pass through the torture of having to see Emily again. I was so caught up in my thoughts I didn't even heard the door open.

"Leah you are here!" I heard Claire's voice.

I smiled at the little girl standing before me; her big eyes looked at me in a mixture of amazement and admiration. If she only knew I was not a person, who should be admired, not by her, not by anyone. I crunched down so that I was at her side and gave her a big hug. My smile grew larger as I felt her little arms wrapped around my neck. There was the other reason why I loved her so much, she was the only person I could be sure that loved me unconditionally.

"I wouldn't miss you birthday for anything in the world" I said as I pulled away.

My eyes widened as I saw the figure standing behind the little girl, Emily, her scared face, her perfect complexion. Why did I suddenly wanted to burst into tears? Oh yes, because that could have been my fate. I could have been the one whose face was deformed and, would I have been able to forgive the person who did this to me?

"Hey Leah" She greeted with her usual warm smile.

Was she faking?

"Hey Emily, nice to see you again"

I lied so naturally, it scared me.

"Come on in. Some of the guys are helping me in the backyard already, but I don't think I trust their taste" Emily laughed as she motioned the inside of the house.

"Sure" I said, doing my best to remain serene.

"Seth you need to come see all my new dolls" I heard Claire say behind me causing me to laugh.

I walked slowly around the familiar living room, my eyes taking in every single detail. Nothing had changed, except for the fact that the pictured of Sam had seemed to oddly multiply. I took two deep breaths before I actually went outside to the backyard. Emily was right; some of the guys were already there. Quill was trying to teach Embry how to set a proper table, while Paul scattered confetti around. The whole sight of it was extremely hilarious. I was about to start laughing when I saw Jake, casually standing next to Sam. My heart stopped, how was I going to go through the whole party without holding his hand, touching his face if, in this very moment, I only wanted to run to him and press my lips against his.

I was taken a back when Jake actually waved at me.

"Hey Leah, you came!"

Why was everyone so surprised?

"Hey Jake" I said giving him a kiss on the cheek and trying to be as distant as possible "Hey everyone" I added in a louder tone of voice.

Time seemed to fly as we both stood there in the yard. Suddenly, I wasn't worried about Sam any more; I even talked to him without my sentences having a hurtful intention. The rest of the boys seemed to notice this because they kept shooting compliments for no apparent reason. Of course they were times in which snappy, bitchy Leah needed to come to life, but none of them really seemed to care.

Little by little the boys started to leave the back yard in order to decorate other parts of the house.

"I appreciate you are doing this for Emily" Sam said with a smile.

By this point it was only Jake, me and him.

"I am not doing this for her, Sam, I am doing it for Claire" I answered possibly too dryly.

"Oh, thank you anyways. I'll be in the kitchen if you need anything"

Yes, he was definitely taken a back by my answer. My eyes followed him until he disappeared behind the living room wall. And even after that, my eyes remain stuck in that direction. That was, until I felt strong arm wrapping around my waist from behind me.

"So…alone again" Jacob whispered in my ear.

I couldn't help but to smile. He had that effect on me.

"Jake come on! Not here, someone might come and I don't want to think what will happen if they see us like this" I whined, although, I truly wanted to remain there.

Jake whirled me around in order to look into my eyes. He was playing dirty; he knew I could not possibly resist that stare, especially when he was so close to me. Slowly, he began leaning in and I couldn't help but to do the same. I closed my eyes in anticipation and then…nothing. I opened my eyes when I heard Jacob's low laughter.

"You…you…" I began to say but I was suddenly silenced by Jacob's lips on mine.

"What were you saying?" he asked cheekily once he broke the kiss.

"That maybe you should kiss me again"

My arms flew to Jacob's neck, pulling him into a much deeper kiss. He smiled into the kiss as he often did when he felt pleased with himself. His fingers softly combed my hair, making me feel even better than what I already was. It was amazing how I could get lost in his kisses, truly get lost. It is as if I was simply in a black room and nothing surrounded me, all I could think about was him, his lips on mine, his hand touching my skin.

"Leah?" I heard a voice coming from the doorway.

I instantly backed up as my eyes found his.

Sam.

A/N: I truly hoped you like the ending…a little bit of a cliffhanger over there but that is just because I WANT YOU TO REVIEWWW: please?


	4. Guilt

A/N: Hey! I need to say in advance that this chapter might not be as descriptive as the others. But! There is a bit of action here. Also, I need a Beta urgently! So if you are interested, just review me okay?

In that very moment, I could have fainted, I felt like fainting. As a matter of fact, I wanted to faint. Much to my luck, I didn't, I remained as conscious as ever staring deep into Sam's eyes. I couldn't figure out what emotions were going through him; his face was like a blank page, as if he wasn't feeling anything, no hate, no jealousy, no confusion, nothing. I started to wonder if it was okay to feel as guilty as I was feeling, it wasn't as if I was doing anything wrong here. There was nothing that attached me to Sam anymore, I was free to date anyone I wanted, even if it was once of his close friends. Slowly, I let go of Jake's hand which was currently holding mine with unbelievable strength.

"Sam…I….just need to explain, this, I…"

"Jake would you leave us alone for a second" Sam's commanding voice spoke.

I raised my head to look at Jake who was obviously waiting for my approval. I simply nodded and then returned my gaze back to the green grass growing beneath me. Jacob's finger brushed my arm for a moment and then he was gone, leaving Sam alone with me.

I wanted to be able to look a Sam straight in the face and tell him I actually had no explanations to give, but I couldn't. I heard how he walked closer to me and placed his hand in my shoulder.

"Promise me you are not hurting him, Leah"

"Listen, Sam, if you think I am only with him because I needed someone to replace you then you are very wrong." I snapped, knowing exactly what he meant with his last words "It took me a while to realize how much in common I had with Jake, but now that I did, I guess it's just okay to try right?"

"You forget easily, I see" Sam's sarcastic voice reached my ears.

"What do you mean? That I forgot you easily?" I raised my voice to contrast Sam's fake calmed one "You have no idea how long I fought to keep you away from my mind, how many nights I dreamed you could suddenly awaken form the imprinting spell and look at me the way you used you. It's just now, when I found someone else to fill my thoughts that you understand you care for me? Sorry, Sam, but that sounds a little bit selfish to me"

"Listen, you know it was not easy for me either, knowing I had hurt you so much, that it was because of me that you turned into that bitter girl no one could stand,"

My eyes grew wide as I heard Sam's words. It felt as if a poisoned arrow had just fled through my heart. He, of all people, was calling me bitter. He, of all people, was having the guts to let me know no one could stand me. He, who was the one to blame, and he knew it. I could feel my blood start to boil inside of me, the heat being too much to bear, my hands, which were balled into fists now, shook uncontrollably.

"Leah, calm down, please" I heard Sam's voice, but it was nothing more than a distant echo. It was too late.

Suddenly, a shot of pain, then everything went black.

"Leah, Leah please answers me, Leah" A familiar voice spoke to me.

I fought hard to open my eyes, but I couldn't, my eye lids were much too heavy. My lips refused to move as well. I wanted to remember what happened, why I was here, unable to move a muscle; but I couldn't.

"What did you tell her? She couldn't just phased because of nothing"

It was Jacob's angry voice. I heard a few strong steps and then a large thud noise.

"Jacob, calm down please, we don't want another accident here" Quill spoke. It was obvious he was the one holding Jacob back.

"Quill, its okay" Sam said "I didn't said anything, just asked a few things"

"You are supposed to take care of us! Not drive us into danger" Jacob kept arguing.

It was then when the memories shot back to my head. Sam's words entered my thoughts creating a flash of anger. How dared he? I even began to think he might have done everything on purpose. Of course, now Emily wouldn't want to see my face anymore, not after I ruined Claire's birthday. Claire, little Claire, I knew she must be scared now, had she seen me turned into a monster?

"I am sorry, Claire," I heard the words escaping my lips. The sound of my own voice scared me; it seemed like a croak, a very weak croak.

Suddenly everything grew quiet. I knew everyone's face was turned towards me even though I could not see them. A soft touch reached my forehead, it was Jacob, I had grown so used to the touch of his skin; I could recognize it anywhere.

"Leah, how are you feeling?" He softly whispered to me.

It was obvious the rest were in shock, since no one made a sound. Carefully, I tried to open my eyes again, this time I was victorious. Although my vision was still blurry, I could see Jake's face looking down at me. He was kneeled besides me, which meant I was lying on the couch. Paul, Quill, and the rest of the boys were all standing behind Jake, keeping what seemed as a "safe distance". Emily was nowhere to be seen.

"Jake," I said smiling as I raised my hand to touch his cheek. I wanted to smile, but I couldn't "What happened? What did I do? Where is Emily?"

Jake placed a finger on top of my lips in order to make me silent. He smiled reassuringly, letting me know everyone was okay.

"Emily is fine, she is checking on Claire. You gave us quite a fright" Jake chuckled.

Checking on Claire? What was she checking? Was she okay? A million questions ran through my head making the pain even worst. Jake's hand combed my hair delicately; I could sense he was doing his best to keep me calmed, but I also knew there was something we were not telling me.

"Please, Jacob, tell me if Claire is okay" I demanded, although, considering the state of my voice, it didn't sound commanding at all.

Silence, it scared me. I knew then, that something wasn't right. What have I done? I should have known better, I should have tried harder to control myself.

"I will explain everything, I promise, but now you need to rest" Jake told me softly.

I closed my eyes, feeling how his fingers traced the skin of my arm. It didn't take long before every thought of what had happened today, was erased from my mind.

But, deep inside, I knew this wouldn't last long.

A/N: Sooo another cliffie hahaha. What happened to Claire? I promise I will clear that in the next chapter. Plus! I will make is Emily's POV so that you know what exactly happened to Leah once she phased. Remember to review! Because, even though I have the other chapter I mind, I won't upload unless you review. Yes, I am evil.


	5. Solution

Suddenly, not a single breath could be heard in the room; I had to open my eyes to realize what was happening

Suddenly, not a single breath could be heard in the room; I had to open my eyes to realize what was happening. It seemed as if the world has just completely stopped from spinning on its own axis for what seemed to be an eternity. It took me a while to realize the boy were started to move away from me, their face turning towards the bedrooms hallway, everything in spectral silence. The chirping sound of birds outside the window seemed like a faint whisper to me, nothing in this world could have prepared me for the sight that was starting to form before me. Standing in the very end of the hallway was Emily, her face held absolutely no expression at all; my heart started its accelerated beating once again. I wanted a clue to tell me how she was feeling, a frown, a slight smile, anything; but all that I could see was exasperating nothing, a blank piece of paper. The expression in my face became one of pain, guilt, sorrow as I finally saw what I had done. There, standing close to Emily and holding tightly to her waist was Claire; surprisingly enough she didn't seem to be frightened by my presence, god knows I would be. But, on her forearm laid three bright red scratches; the vivid resemblance of the ones her aunt had on her beautiful face.

I couldn't stop my hand to fly to my mouth in surprise, tears ran uncontrollably down my eyes but I was unable to move, to sob, to even blink. I could only imagine what if felt like for Emily, to have her very own niece being marked in the same way that she was; she would never forgive her, not even that loving character of hers would prevent her from banning me from her sight. What have I done? I was a monster; it was not as if I haven't know this all along but, this, this loosing control, it only made things more clear to me. I had nothing in me that differed me from those werewolves in terror stories who attacked humans just for the sake of it, because they couldn't control it, it was just an instinct. God, I cannot even remember what I did; I cannot remember what I saw, how I felt, all that remember after I phased is pure darkness.

My thoughts were shoved away by two small arms wrapping themselves around my neck; my eyes grew and my lips slightly parted as I realized who it was. Tears again ran freely down my cheeks as I hugged little Claire. I promised myself in that very moment would never phase again, ever, it was too dangerous for Claire, for Emily, for everyone.

"Leah, you are okay!" the four year-old exclaimed as she held me tighter.

"Yes, I am dear" I answered, trying to keep my voice steady so that she wouldn't realize I was crying. One of my hands combed her dark hair as the other cleaned my tears. "How about you, does it hurt? Are you still scared?"

"I'm a big girl" Claire stated proudly, a triumphant look on her face as she pulled away from the hug. "And auntie Emily says the wolf has gone away now, so I am not scared" she added with a small nod in the end.

As I held her shoulders, I looked up at Emily with a questioning look on my face. The girl knew nothing; she had no idea that the creature who had attacked her had been me. Emily had covered for me. The guilt in me grew ten times bigger now, and to think that the idea that she would hate me crossed my mind even for a slight second. Emily wasn't me; he heart was made out of pure gold while mine was possibly made out of coal or some dark stone. She had forgiven Sam, she had forgiven me and I couldn't bring myself to fully forgive her; maybe I was as bitter as the boys say I am. A quiet Emily gave me a reassuring smile before she approached me and patted Claire's head.

"Now come on, Claire, we are not going to let a little scratch ruin your birthday, right?" Emily told the little girl lovingly. How can she manage to look peaceful even in the worst of times? She had a gift, she definitely had a gift.

With one last kiss on the cheek, Claire was gone together with Emily and I was left with the boys. My eyes traveled across their faces as I stood up; once my gaze fell on Quill I felt as if my blood had transformed into ice. His eyes told me everything that he wanted to say without even muttering a single word; I knew he would kill me right then if he had the chance but I understood him or, at least, I tried to. I can only imagine what imprinting feels like but, if it's even stronger than love, then Quill must be feeling as if I attacked him as well. Giving two small steps towards him, I spoke.

"Quill I…" I started only to be cut off by the sound of his deep voice.

"It's okay Leah" h stated coldly before turning his back on me and walking out to the garden where Emily and Clair were.

The same way he had done, the other boys started to turn around and leave none of them wishing to be near me probably because it took too much self control not to phase. So I was left there, my eyes fixed on the wooden floor wondering what will happen next, wondering if the boys would ever bring themselves to forgive me the same way Emily had. I only lifted my eyes when I felt a hand place on my shoulder, Jacob. A sigh escaped my lips as my chocolate gaze met his, silence fell for a moment, neither of us knowing exactly what to say.

"Are you going to leave as well? Believe me; I wouldn't blame you if you did" I told him, by voice only above a whisper; the feeling of my heart being clutched didn't allow me to talk any louder.

"I won't, Leah. Not in a million years" Jake said. I knew, for a fact, that those words weren't real, that they were some sort of reassuring sentence but nothing more. Jacob was far too young to truly understand the meaning of his promise.

"Don't say that. Just say you will be with me now and that's enough" I answered as I stepped closer to him, burying my face on his chest; his arms circling my waist.

"Jake…do they know?" the words escaped my lips faster than my brain could process them. I wasn't meaning to actually say them out loud but it was too late. It was obvious that Sam knew what had been going on between Jake and me but what about the rest of the pack? I was sure they wouldn't understand just in the same way that Sam didn't.

"No, Sam hasn't said a word since you two talked" Jake explained as his hands soothingly went up and down my back, as if he was trying to make a child stop crying. It amazed me how someone who could be so childish could also be mature at the times when it was needed; maybe it was just in his blood, maybe that's why he was supposed to be the chief of the pack.

"Thank god" I breathed out as I stepped away from the hug and gave Jake a light smile. "You know? Just go and help the others. I think I need to have some time to think, really." I suggested.

"Leah I…" he started to argue but then gave out a defeated sigh. "Okay, just keep yourself out of trouble, okay?" he added playfully.

"I'll try…" I followed his game before giving him a quick goodbye kiss. "See you later I guess"

The relief I felt as I left the house was unbelievable; maybe it was the clash of the cool air against my always warm skin or the fact that I could hear the waves roar not so far away. I simply walked, allowed my feet to take me wherever they wanted to; I was tired of thinking, of trying to find an explanation for what I had done back at Emily's place. Every time I did so, the possible answers drove me insane, was I angry at Sam? Did I actually intend to hurt him? Did that meant I didn't love him anymore? No, no, I did love him; but, if that was so, then why did I lost my patience so quick? A loud 'ugh' escaped my lips as I threw my hands up in the air in exasperation.

"God, take the ability to think away from me, please" I groaned as I pressed the bridge of my nose in order to avoid a headache from taking over me.

The echo of my words reached my ears just I realized where I was standing. The cliff, the place where all this madness had began and probably the place where all this madness could stop. As I walked loser towards the edge I couldn't help but to ask myself what would the pack be without me? Emily and Sam would be together without anyone interfering; Jake could simply go away and find his imprintee, someone he truly loved; the boys would finally stop having my annoying thoughts in their heads. Yes, I was the pebble in everybody's show, the thing that restrained them from having complete happiness.

Standing right at the edge; I spread my arms open and closed my eyes. Just one jump, one leap of faith and let god do the rest. If I lived or…died, it was completely up to him but at least I tried.

"Leah! What the hell are you doing?" I heard a voice just before I stepped into thin air, feeling free as my body fell.

A/N: Finally another chapter! Yes, finally inspiration hit me and I hope you guys like it. Just press that review button and make me happy. If you review, I promise my updates will be…well, quicker hahaha.


	6. Awakening

A/N: Yaaay! I am glad I am not taking too long to update now! Okay so, this chapter will be a little bit shorter than the rest but thing is that it's really…strong hahaha so I guessed I should stick to the emotional part and just leave the action for the next chapter. Still, how you like it and keep sending awesome reviews cause they fuel me up!!

**Freedom, peace, power, calm, strength, joy, bliss.**

**Then, the cold water hit me like a marble floor. Still, despite the initial rush of pain, the feeling of the cold water against my too warm skin made me feel better. My body fought to get out of the water but my mind kept telling it to remain still and it was winning. It would be the best for all, for Jake, for Sam, for Emily, for Quill and for Claire. I am nothing but a pebble in the shoe for everyone in the pack and god knows if even for the people outside it. Who needs a bitch anyways? No one. Most of the time I spend with people I am bitter, angry. I have tried my best to keep every single person away form me, scared to get attached and then get stabbed right through the heart just like Sam did.**

**But I don't blame him, I can't bring myself to blame him even though I pretend I do; he couldn't fight it just as I can't fight the necessity to breathe right now. Still, somehow it feels right, just right, how I feel my lungs slowly filling in with water, how I feel my vision starting to blur until I am alone in the darkness where I know that I belong. Suddenly, I feel at home and I am to not hollow anymore; that little space inside my heart is filled with something I had been unable to recognize before and, right in front of my close eyelids, I can see Jake's figure. Jake, what am I doing? Why am I here? It is then when desperation hit me; I was trying to get away from the world arguing that I would never been happy there and it is now, when there is no way back, that I realize I had missed my chance for happiness. Maybe I just wasn't born to be happy, besides, it's useless to fight it now, only seconds left and I can feel it. There is still hope for me, I have heard people saying that heaven is wonderful and it you never feel pain or anger or sadness. But would I be able to go to such a beautiful place when I hadn't believed in god until this very moment? It's odd how you only believe in a higher being when you are in danger or dying, like me. Up this point I didn't believe in anyone, in anything, people I had believed in had betrayed me and didn't wanted to suffer any longer. It is so extremely ironic how my mother had given me a biblical name and I had turned out to be anything but a saint. I don't care where I an going anymore, I am floating, falling, and all that matters is that I will be gone.**

"**Leah, Leah please talk to me. Don't do this, come back!" I can hear Jake's voice in my ears, it seems so real, so close. I can feel his arms tugging me close to him; this is heaven, it must be heaven.**

**A stinging feeling in my throat makes me know it isn't true, I shouldn't be feeling any pain in heaven. It is then when the salt water exits my lips and I can feel air entering my nostrils once again; I am alive, I am alive. The roar in my ears doesn't restrain me from hearing several gasps, probably as surprised as I am that I am still breathing steadily. Despite the muttering, that felt too loud, Jake's voice I could distinguish; his sweet and claming voice whispering into my ears probably scared that the rest of the pack would listen. I want to answer, I want to answer so bad but I am still struggling to open my eyes. He seems to notice since he gently combs my hair. "It's okay, just relax" he says soothingly and out of the sudden I feel like crying.**

**Then I hear it, her voice. "I'm sorry I could get her before," she says, her tone of voice still not entirely believable to me. It had been her who had called for me before I stepped into the abyss, I wonder why I didn't recognized it before. "You did everything you could Bella, at least you got to us in time" Sam's voice now reached my ears together with a feeling of anger. Somehow I always associated him with this feeling and I didn't even knew why he had this power; someone I loved so much had turned into something loathsome. Ha. Maybe that is exactly the reason why.**

"**Jake," I croaked weakly, the salt still stinging. Silence came right after that. Say it, just say it I kept telling myself but no, I wasn't strong enough. "Thanks" I completed the sentence, funny how that wasn't the word I had initially planned to do it with. Slowly, I opened my eyes squinting then immediately as the strong light shined. But I could see him, I could see that smile that instantly broke into the darkness of my heart.**

"**Just rest, Leah" he said as he lifted me up in his arms "We will talk tomorrow, okay?" Jacob whispered as I wrapped my arms around his neck and nuzzled my head on his chest, feeling protected, safe and at home once again.**

**A/N: Hope you all liked this! This chapter is a bit more poetic than the rest but just let me know what you think. I know some words and phrases are tangled up but I guessed that's how a trail of thought should be. Just review! ;)**


	7. Loss

A/n: Hello everyoneeee! I apologize again for taking too long but I really like this chapter and I hope you guys do too. Leave me some lovely comments please; those are the ones that keep me going.

Warmth, almost too much warmth. I slowly turned in my bed, feeling the comfortable covers around my body. At first, I had no idea how I reached my house but, little by little, memories of what had happened flooded my memory. The clash of the cold water, the lack of air, the stinging in my throat, Jacob's voice. He had been the one who brought me here. If he did then he must be here still. Almost at the same time that thought reached my head I tried to sit up swiftly but I was stopped by hands pressing down of my shoulders and bringing me down into my previous position. My eyes opened to reveal the smiling face of Jacob, my Jacob. "Hold on there, don't overestimate your strength" he said with his usual playful tone which I had learned to adore, it made me laugh softly.

"You almost left us there" he added, his tome becoming a bit more serious as he gently ran his hand though my raven black hair. Pain showed in his eyes as he said those last words and, in that moment, I felt like the most stupid person to walk the face of the earth. How could I believe that I was doing him a favor by leaving him? I had been selfish, thinking only in what would make me feel better and giving silly excuses on why it was better to do so.

"I'm sorry, Jake. I really am" I tried my best to apologize but words seemed so superfluous at the time, there was nothing I could say to erase what I tried to do. I had been seconds away of committing suicide and that wasn't something someone who was perfectly sane did.

"There is no need to even begin to apologize" Jacob answered but there was something different in the way he acted towards me, it was more dry than before. Before I could even ask him what was happening he started talking again. "I just need to know what went through your mind, Leah" he demanded taking his hand away from my head and taking my hand, giving it a little squeeze "What made you jump? Wasn't I a good reason for you to stay alive?"

Now it all made sense, perfect sense. He had all the right to be mad at her, after all, she hadn't even given a good thought at what would happen to him if she died. Yes, she had told herself that he would be better off without her but, was that the truth. No, absolutely not. If she had stopped a few seconds to think things over then she would have realized that he needed someone by his side, that he had been rejected by someone he loved the same way she was. He was not only her support but she was also his.

"That's not true" I said before he could go on "You were the one who made me come back, Jake. When I heard your voice I…I cannot explain what I felt but…"

"But what?" he asked almost too suddenly "What made you jump, please tell me"

"Look at what I did, okay? I tried to attack Sam, I tried to kill him!"

"You weren't conscious in that moment, Leah, there was too much rage for you to control yourself. We have all gone through a moment like that in one moment or the other" he argued. I wanted to walk away from him, to shut him up somehow. It should be wrong how right his words were.

"Come on! I hurt Claire and, as far as I am concerned no one in the pack wants to even look at me anymore!" I yelled as I finally sat down on my bed, my eyes looking directly into his. Why couldn't he see the things the way I saw them? Was it too hard to understand my point?

"I want you here!" he yelled back as he stood up from the chair he had been sitting on. He did so with such strength that the chair fell back with a loud noise.

Silence fell between us as he stared into my eyes, a mixture of rage and hurt looking at my face but into my soul. Slowly, I lowered my eyes until they were looking at my hands which were resting on my lap; I couldn't handle looking at him anymore, not without guilt taking mercilessly over me. Was there something wrong with me? Why did I have to hurt everyone I loved? Perhaps it was a curse, a curse for never showing my affection to anyone before, a curse for hiding my true feelings.

He didn't wait for my answer. I heard Jacob's steps walking out of my room but didn't dare to raise my eyes to give one last look at him. My head kept telling me that I was crazy to let him walk away from me like that, especially when I had just realized that he needed me, probably almost as much as I needed him to keep myself from breaking apart. I knew I should have run behind him in the very second I heard him exit my room, when I heard him saying goodbye to my mother, when I heard him close the my house's way too harshly. But I couldn't.

Slowly, I brought my head down only to sniff a familiar scent that made my knees tremble, Jake's. My hands grabbed the collar of the sweater I was wearing and brought it to my nose, it was his. I cannot begin to explain what I felt in that moment, what jolt of energy ran through my body. But, in that moment, I knew I couldn't let him go. It is too late; I thought as I stood up and started walking out of my room not even caring to take a look at myself before I did so. If he had decided to run then he could be miles away from where I was already. I was a fool, ha, as if I needed to repeat that to myself.

As I opened the front door, my eyes widened in surprise. He was there, sitting on my porches' stairs, his dark eyes looking to the front, lost, completely lost in thought. Carefully not to make too much noise, though I knew he had already heard me coming, I walked towards him and silently sat by his side. I shifted my eyes from his face to the tress that could be spotted in the distance. Taking a deep breath, I fixed my eyes on him knowing that if I didn't spoke now I probably never would.

"I want to be here too" I finally said, my voice breaking slightly.

It took a while for him to shift his stare to my face. My blood could hhave easily be turned into eyes under his gaze, he was next to me and yet I saw him so distant. Where my actions that bad? Yes, it had been no game, I had tried to kill myself…kill myself.

"Then you will prove it to me someday" he said, his hand slowly rising to caress the side of my cheek, my eyes closing at the contact. A sensation of emptiness greeted me a**s he took it away. "But not now. You need to rest and I think I do too"**

Standing up and placing a small kiss on my forehead, he was gone. Leaving me as alone as I had began. Many questions filled my mind as I watched his figure getting lost in the forest. The most important of them being the one Jacob himself had asked me a few minutes ago. Why did I jumped?


	8. Answers

A/N: Okay so this is a bit of an introspective chapter. It's mainly Leah giving out explanation for her behavior and then thinking about Jacob's question. I hope it will help you to understand my view of her a bit better and I am sure it will help you to understand many of her reactions, especially the jumping of the cliff.

Jacob's Black departure left an ache, an open wound in the rest of the pack. Embry and Quill were invaded by sadness, Jared and the rest of the boys, by deception and Paul felt irritated, while Seth felt desolated by the sudden loss of his hero. And Sam? Sam understood it, or at least he could try to, and he took the situation in the best way he could, the same way Billy did.

I was the only one who felt furious.

Furious because Jacob had the choice of making his exit as dramatic as possible, knowing that, wherever he went, he would be pitied and comprehended. I was furious because, if Jacob whined, if he burned with hate towards the person he was running away from and loved, everyone would accept it as something natural. How not to feel hate when his rival was his worst of enemies, someone that no one in the pack would ever feel pity towards?

I felt furious because Jacob could give himself the luxury of being childish, of abandoning his family, his pack and his obligations like if those things weren't wrapped as shackles from his paws. He could fall into desperation, forget about the whole world, turn into the most selfish person to walk the planet…and it would be okay. It would always be okay.

I was furious because our stories were so much alike that it was like a knife piercing through my soul every time I looked at him, every time I heard his thought about iher/i, his pain was a painful memory of my own, of my weakness.

That is why I had bothered him so much that day at the cliff. I knew how I felt: the ripping apart, the fury, the sadness, the self pity, everything mixed and burning inside your chest like acid that corrodes your guts. I knew it, cause that was they way I had felt, betrayed and sad but, over all things, lost. Lost because the sun by which almost my whole life whirled around was now gone, leaving me turning on an empty orbit. I knew how much the pitiful glances itched the same way that the pats in the back, the empty words of consolation and the hurtful stare in the eyes of the person who had once looked at you with love and admiration.

In its moment, the fury I felt for the injustice of her situation was the thing that saved me. It saved me form depression, of sinking slowly and inexorably into the abyss of self pity. The fury allowed me to walk with my chin high even when every one of her footsteps crashed my soul, it allowed me to wake up every morning even when my world didn't have a sun by which it could spin around.

I couldn't hate Emily even if I wanted to, with her sweet smile and infinite patience. I tried, I tried with all her might, but I couldn't. The ire blazed in my veins but I couldn't turn it over my cousin, my best friend, my sister. I knew, even in the deepest of pains, that Emily never wanted to hurt me; that she would have cut her hand off if it could save my suffering. No, I couldn't hate Emily.

I could have tired to hate Sam, but it would have been absurd. The moon could not crash against the earth, the earth could not get away from the sun, and I couldn't have gotten mad at Sam even if she had craved to do so. At least not in that moment.

And I couldn't be mad because they were together, not when she saw the bond that joined then, the love that shined in their eyes. Not when I remembered Sam's desolation those weeks that Emily was in the hospital or the way she forgave and comforted him. I couldn't get mad when I knew what I knew now, how the scars that now cut Emily's face had been produced and all the pain that they had brought.

I couldn't even get mad at imprinting as a whole, because now that I saw Sam and Emily, even if it brought me pain to know it, I know they were made for each other. Sometimes I wondered if I could have been able to forgive Sam if I had been on Emily's shoes, if I could have overcome the horror of knowing his secret, of seeing the darkest side of his nature. I looked at my reflection in the water, wolf eyes looked back at me, and I got my answer almost too quickly; No, I couldn't have. I couldn't have looked over it or even accept the fact that he had a life in which I would never be completely included, that there will always be angry for not sharing his genes, his destiny. I had seen my own dark side at Claire's party, the way I had snapped at him, the way I had forgotten all reason and attached him. I wouldn't have been able to forgive him, the same I can't forgive him now.

I couldn't get mad with Emily or with Sam, not even with the bond that joined them. So I focused my ire and poison on my own destiny, the heritage that took away the man that I had always loved and the life of my father, that will always mark my future and the one of my family. I focused my anger at my own nature, with the duty that I had been forced to carry, with the new family that I had to accept but, over all things, I got mad at receiving other people's compassion and playing the role of victim that my loved ones forced me to play every day.

I committed myself to destroy the image of martyr that people had built for me. I was sick of being "poor Leah", with my heart broken and my truncated hopes, everyone's pond of pity. Perhaps many people would have loved to see me dump my feelings on Sam and Emily, but I never liked pleasing anyone and I wasn't going to do it now. So I unloaded my fury with the rest of the universe. I built a mask of coldness and cynicism for myself and when not even my mind was free of privacy violation; I constructed a shield of hurtful thoughts and wretched feelings so that no one could see my heart bleeding on the inside.

I decided that she preferred hate over compassion and I focused to get it but, in the end, I only managed to hurt myself, because the guilt and the anger kept impregnating every single one of my thoughts about Sam, every single one of Emily's words. It killed me slowly, but saying it out loud would only have gotten me even more compassion, more poison to my already weary soul. I knew what hurt the pity, the self compassion, and it why I tried to help Jacob in the only way she could: making him mad. If he got mad, if the ire won depression, maybe he could recover a bit, keep going despite the pain.

It amazed me how I hadn't thought about all of this before. How I never had time on my own to think over things and get to the bottom of it all. How I never really took the time to glance into my own soul and clean out the fog that made it obscure and lonely. Maybe that's why Jake left me to be alone, for me to think and understand myself before trying to make him understand me and my crazy decisions.

It was looking through it all that I got the answer I was looking for. I had jumped because it would have been the easiest way to put closure in a chapter of my life. I was certain I didn't longer loved Sam, I didn't hold any grudge against Emily, I didn't felt any pain when I saw them together only awkwardness. It was so complicated to make everyone believe I had changed, especially after my attack. No one would believe it even if I screamed it. They thought I would never change. The only one who was willing to witness that transformation in my soul was Jacob. He was the only who could have stopped me from jumping off that cliff and that is why I erased every single thought of him away from my mind. I was decided to die; I wanted it to happen so I got rid of everything that made me want to keep living, Jake being the strongest one.

"_It wasn't that hard, wasn't it?" _I heard a deep voice in my head. I turned around only to see Jacob standing by my side in his wolf form. He had been hearing all along. I wanted to be mad at him for spying me but that had only made things easier for me since I didn't have to put anything into words.

"_I guess not, not when you are hearing my thoughts" _I replied with a small laugh that came out as a bark. _"You followed me all the way from my place?" _

"_Yes, I never really went away. It is just easier to keep an eye on you when I am not being too obvious" _

I wanted to hug him, badly. So I simply went near him and placed my head on top of his neck, my wolf way of hugging him. He gently moved his head up, caressing my fur with his and then playfully licked the side of my face.

"_Hey! You know how many of your germs I have now?" _I thought jokingly and we both gave out our barks of laughter which, slowly, dieD out until we only looked into each other's eyes.

Words weren't needed; we both knew what out bodies felt, what our souls felt. Taking our time, we phased back into our human forms. My cheeks burning more than usual at the sight of his naked torso. I bit my lower lip as he walked closer, my heart threatening to pop out of my chest, adrenalin already rushing through my veins and that sensation in my stomach beginning to make me feel uneasy. Gently, carefully, his hand went down my bare arm and I closed my eyes. His lips touched mine almost as if he was scared of breaking me. Little by little, our kisses gained intensity, our bodies gained heat, and our brains shut down allowing us to simply give in.


End file.
